Joey | 21 | Canterbury, England | Aspiring Actor and Model


I’ve had twitter (@JoeySimsUK) on and off for about 2 years.  I was ‘straight’ when I got it. What inspired me was the amount of the ‘gay’ audience I had. Day after day I’d have mentions from guys being genuinely nice and thoughtful and interested in the things I had to say. I wouldn’t say I was a homophobe, but I definitely didn’t understand the whole thing. 

I’m not saying I haven't always been bisexual, but I wasn’t attracted to any guys before that. Even when I was, it was more of an emotional attachment at first, then a full blown sexual attraction. Either way, when I ‘came out’ I was amazed at how nice everyone was.  My twitter followers mean everything to me and I appreciate all of the support I’ve ever had. 
"Coming to terms with being LGBT is pretty hard for anyone. 
For me personally, the acceptance was already there. 
It was the society that we live in today that was scary."

The idea of telling my family that I was actually bisexual was questionable to say the least, but fortunately it was fine, and my family are great. What I did struggle with though, was the very little I knew about the LGBT community.

I was very naive in every way when it came to everything bisexual. I even had my own stereotypes of gay people which, of course, I didn’t like. I wasn’t aware of the dangers of unprotected sex (HIV etc.) and generally lived life how I wanted to.

That was until I started watching both the UK and US versions of ‘Queer as Folk’... truly an amazing series. It provided information on every single subject you can think of in the LGBT world, and I learnt a lot… I mean a lot. I think it’s such a shame that the series has ended. It would be great for a reboot as I think as well as being a well written show it would help the new generation learn about sexuality and maybe defeat some stereotypes people may have about the community.

I’m sure that by now, we don’t have to tell you that the makers of Queer as Folk changed UK and American culture and opened the gates to a flood of fully developed LGBT characters on television. There was virtually nothing gay on American television before QAF, and even with the onslaught of ‘gay’ shows, the characters on those shows take more cliché roles, or are presented as token, only present to lure a gay audience seeking representation in the media. On being asked what he is most proud of, having been part of a culturally significant show, Hal Sparks (Michael in Queer as Folk USA) said:

Queer as Folk US ran from December 2000 - August 2005 for 83 episodes over 5 seasons
“I think the portrayal of the Ben and Michael relationship as a [HIV] positive/negative couple, because that was the first time that was ever on television in America. It was the first time I ever remember it being in anything available to mainstream America. And then dealing with the issue of adopting kids too. And I think because the Michael character and the Ben character were the kind of people that you might know from the office, there was nothing extraordinary about their personality that would immediately peg them as gay, and so it was an easy crossover for a lot of the straight audience to understand it and get it. I catch a lot of shit for constantly reminding people that I’m straight, but that’s just how my life is. My life will remind you that I’m straight. The same way that Harvey Fierstein’s will remind you that he’s gay. You know what I mean – it’s just who you are.

I really honestly have to say that sexuality is not a choice. But one of the reasons why I think it’s healthy to constantly remind people is because the vast majority of straight people think gay is contagious. They think it’s either a bad choice, an immoral choice, or they think it’s something you catch, and that’s where their biggest fear comes from. Homophobia is largely rooted in the fear that you may become it yourself, or that it will take you over without your consent. I’ve been closer to it than probably any straight guy in the history of entertainment and in the end if I’m still myself; I’m still straight; I’m still me; then maybe that takes a bit of the fear away for those people. And they go, ‘It didn’t turn him gay, so maybe it’s not a lifestyle, maybe it is genetic or a choice a spirit makes before it enters the body on a metaphysical level,’ or whatever you wanna call it. ‘Maybe it is a birth right as opposed to something my religious book tells me based on ignorance.”

Coming out is a big thing for anyone in that situation. It was surprisingly easy for me, since it got to the point where I did not care what anyone thought about me. When I did it, not only did I feel better about the huge weight that had been lifted off my shoulders but I was lucky enough to have friends and family around me that supported and treated me exactly how they always did. My advice for anyone would be to be yourself and if you're worried how others may react, don't be. If they do not accept you for who you are, what good are they in your life anyway?

Follow Joey on Twitter - @JoeySimsUK


Joey's story was originally featured on the awesome LGBT Icons Website

HTML Comment Box is loading comments...

. . . click here to return to all of January's stories . . .